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Catholic or United Wedding: Pleasing the Parents
Dear Shawn & Katia,
After many failed romances, I have finally found the perfect woman for me. We are both 34 and we have decided to get married before having children. An issue that has arisen is that her parents are insisting on us being wed in a Catholic church while my parents are refusing to go anywhere except a United church. While neither of us is religious, debating whose parents we should listen to has caused us much stress. Do you have any ideas on how we should resolve this?
-- Engaged in Detroit
Engaged in Detroit,
Have you asked your girlfriend what her dream wedding looks like? Many women dream about their wedding day from childhood. The bottom line: it's up to her. However, to bypass hurt feelings among family members, ask each side of the family if they would be able to help out with the cost for having a wedding in their church. Reason with them and be honest. One solution could be to have two weddings. Another could be to have your own wedding the way you want it- perhaps not even in a church. This is your decision, not theirs, and both parents will still love and care for you no matter what you decide.
-- Shawn and Katia
Comment submitted - April 17, 2007
Dear Shawn and Katia,we are all children of God,weither,catholic or united etc. They are also both christian churches, therefore both parents should be told that God is present regardless of the denomination. Marry in one and have the other priest/minister assist or bless the couple at the ceremony. Everybody should be happy! Otherwise forget the building,choose your own site and invite the two clergymen from both churches,have them both do the ceremony, you will be married in the eyes of man and God.
-- Best wishes, M.
Thanks for the great comments M. We agree that this advice will work for many couples facing this situation!
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